Aesthetic Butterfly Locs – When I was looking for hair inspo on my Explore page, only one look spoke volumes for an effortless, get out of bed and do nothing look: the bow tie.

There are no dreadlocks that are pretty much at the bottom of the totem pole when it comes to hairstyles that I would ever consider.

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Aesthetic Butterfly Locs

Yes, it’s amazing, isn’t it? Only something in this style always seems awkward to me, somehow uncomfortable.

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But when I saw a girl rocking a waist-length bow tie on my phone screen, that triggered my defining moment, if you will. Although the style is visually similar to dreadlocks, the hair added with a deliberate twist made it more flattering on me. Her messy bun and side-swept bangs were anything but typical as she posed for a group photo with other girls sporting lace wigs and individual braids. I ended up in aesthetics and related to his beliefs.

, is a sanctuary for beauty professionals that can be booked for any style, from braids to braids to a silky press. Over a hundred and fifty stylists on the site promised they were the best people to deliver my new look. Being the budget minded girl my mom raised me, I made my price a priority, found a stylist and flooded her inbox with photo inspiration. I knew that the arcs would have to be dramatically longer, with moderate interference (how messy everywhere is). For the past few months, I’ve been amazed at how my melanin makes my skin break out with amazing hair, so I decided to power it up.

With each ending place my braid fell on my shoulder, I became more and more destructive. I couldn’t pretend to scratch my head to see how much was left. The process took about three and a half hours. When I looked in the mirror, it was all I imagined. With my baby hair and tousled ends giving off a pretty beach vibe, I walked out of the appointment looking like… well, a new kid. I tilt my head back and forth, slamming into my car to feel my hair whipping my bottom. I was. that Until I face my mother.

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I tilt my head back and forth, slamming into my car to feel my hair whipping my bottom. I was. That …. until I run into my mother.

Then silence. All I need to know is that this look wasn’t exactly Maggie-approved. My curious, brave look, which made me feel the best, was immediately met with only an exaggerated expression of disbelief. I never tried to get my mother’s approval; I was blessed to not have parents to pressure me. But still, when I had it, I felt satisfied. To be honest, her dislike didn’t surprise me because my mom’s style is minimal. She never dyed her hair any color other than black, and the biggest comfort zone thing she ever did was switch to her square-rimmed deep purple sunglasses. Mother’s theory of “less is more” was not inherited, but it is a difference that we have come to accept about each other over time. So I smiled through his criticism, convincing myself it wasn’t so bad.

I waited to debut my hair in public until a few weeks later when my mom visited my favorite cousin in Atlanta. Of course I would get positive reinforcement from someone close to my generation. I FaceTimed my cousin, my mom was in the background, and she answered:

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It’s a term Tresemme global artist and international hair expert Naivasha finds “unacceptable”, especially because it’s used in a negative way out of ignorance. Because many women (and society) don’t understand black hair, it’s seen as difficult or even “wrong.” When in fact there is nothing wrong with textured hair. American culture has never appreciated that. Coming to terms with this and rejecting the word “ghetto” starts with education.

Outside, I proudly sang the words. Inwardly, I drowned. My cousin laughed and said it looked good, but also, “It’s too much

The next few days were difficult. Wrapping my hair in a bun to draw less attention, I began to feel more and more self-conscious, my thoughts speeding up a mile a minute. Can I dye my hair black to at least make the color less greasy? Maybe a shorter look would be better? Should I remove it completely? Next, I looked at my signature well-designed XL nails (à la Sheneneh Jenkins from

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). With my new hair and old nails, I definitely feel like the ghetto cousin of the family.

Naivasha faced the same self-doubt when she found her fake bow head. “I felt really weird about fake locks because I didn’t think I looked good at all,” she explains. “I didn’t look very smart and sophisticated – maybe I didn’t look very professional.” All things began to move in my mind because I saw. Like Naivasha, I had friends knocking my bow down, but I still got looks that didn’t make me feel good inside.

“I felt really weird about the fake curls because I didn’t think they looked very straight. I didn’t look as smart and sophisticated – maybe I didn’t look as professional. All sorts of things started running through my mind. Because I’m looking.”

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I couldn’t understand my feelings. How did I go from my mother, the humblest of seven sisters, to the end of the ghetto? And have I always been like this? The feeling of shame was strong and overwhelming. I feel that people do not look at me, but with criticism.

Once again my best, the IG Algorithm, was delivered with a much needed reality check. (In a way, it’s like when you call your best friend when you’re angry and she tells you what you need to hear to feel better.) When I needed it most, dark, beauty-positive content flooded my search page. the news. Afros that can touch the sky, sets of acrylic nails with different colors on each toe, and eyelash extensions long enough to question whether you can even see them. Finally I asked, “Why am I ashamed to be myself?”

It’s 2022, and at 28, I’m facing the unknown fear of not being able to see what I look like.

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To look. For decades, black women have pushed the boundaries of beauty created by European standards in an effort to live up to their own ideals of what a harmless, respectable woman of color should look like. These standards are no longer actively promoted, but let’s be real, racial discrimination was legal until the 2019 CROWN Act.

Meanwhile, our white counterparts have taken advantage of everything we’ve been told to be ashamed of. I see brunettes dyeing their hair red, braiding it and calling themselves hipsters. Or natural blondes put them on and call them “boho-chic”. But I, a black girl from DC, decided to drastically change my perspective and immediately felt inferior because my innermost thoughts reminded me: You can’t do what these white people are doing. Girls do. Nai’vasha wondered why so much emphasis was placed on hair in black society.

“Historically speaking, the authenticity of our natural hair was not accepted or recognized as a blueprint or foundation of beauty,” she explains. “When you’re talking about Hollywood, when you’re talking about brand attachment — curvy, curly, curly, frizzy, none of those things were in the conversation when you’re talking about symbols of beauty. As warm as all our heritage.”

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“When you’re talking about Hollywood, when you’re talking about brand attachment — curvy, curvy, curly, frizzy, none of those things were in the conversation when you’re talking about symbols of beauty. As warm as all our heritage.”

Also custom roots. Similar to the colorful culture of the United States, there is also an influence of Jamaican classicism. Your social class reflects the family you come from, what you do for a living, and how you live in society. It’s all about respect, and if you don’t have respect, you’re nothing. It also didn’t help that my grandmother was telling friends about her granddaughter with naturally long, beautiful hair instead of my academic honors.

I love being a Jamaican woman. I love being a black woman. I like being a woman, period. But the sad truth is that I purposely remind Brenna that she loves Brenna. It means not letting outside opinions dictate who I am

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I must be, and rather what I am. After letting the bow ties live for two months, my mom finally came up with a compliment: “It suits your face.

Besides being beautiful (and expensive), I wore bows because they forced me to face demons I didn’t know existed. Everyone has their own beginning in the journey of self-discovery. Naive like that